19th
Teddy KGB: Two grand.
Mike: All right, I’ll call the two grand. I’ll gamble. Don’t splash the pot.
Teddy KGB: You’re on a draw, Mike? Go away. This one is not good for you. And in my club, I will splash the pot whenever the f—- I please.
Mike: Okay. I’m gonna check, Teddy.
Teddy KGB: That’s right. Big Teddy…bets…the pot.
Mike: All right, I’m gonna call you, or else I won’t respect myself tomorrow morning.
Teddy KGB: Respect is all you’ll have left in the morning. Last card coming.
Mike: Check.
Teddy KGB: It hurts, doesn’t it? You can’t believe what fell. All your dreams… dashed. Hopes down the f——-g drain. Your fate, he is sitting right beside you. That ace could not have helped you. I bet it all.
Mike: You’re right, Teddy. The ace didn’t help me. I flopped a nut straight.
Teddy KGB: M——-f——-!
—
As I was preparing to run a poker game this past weekend, it was crystal clear that I needed to do this scene from Rounders, one of my favorites. It’s especially funny if you make the red gummibear do his lines in a John Malkovitch Russian accent. Try it at home!
